Since being given a divine gift of healing that has allowed me to walk again without assistance and to have more of a normal life, I have found it challenging to say the least. First, the Lord directed me to several things to be done each of which proved personally terribly disappointing even as I was aware that the Lord's work and will had been done.
We are always in a danger of loving something more than God does.
In my case He directs me to go here, and I go. One challenge for me is not to allow any expectations to build up. If they do, then they will need to be eliminated and that pruning can be unpleasant. The Lord Jesus and His desires and direction are what matter, and sometimes it is very unsettling to find that He will not allow us to stay on the mountaintop and build booths to live in. No, we must keep moving onward to Jerusalem, the Holy City that is above.
It is true that when you have left your body during clinical death and you taste of Paradise and the immediate Presence of God... returning to this world can be very difficult. But in time one can see its own tragic beauty and learn to love those moments and movements in life where the fragrance of Christ can be inhaled and cherished.
When one decides that one will do whatever the Lord says, one must forsake the opinions of people. In their eyes I could either be a loyal servant of Christ, an enormous fool, or a madman ... and none of that matters. What does the Lord say when you have done what He has asked you to do? 'Well done, thou good and faithful servant.' And so we press on, onward to the Jerusalem that is above. And we do so with a heart full of joy knowing that doing what the Lord bids us to do is the only joy that never fades away, and it is the only 'work' of man that will not perish.
Yes, I would like everyone to respond to the messages I bring from the Lord, but my rôle is simply to be the emissary not to try to elicit a desired response. All of that is up to the Holy Ghost, and the Spirit will accomplish all that needs to be done.
Recently I went to a place in another country where I was told by heavenly visitors "Welcome, home." and I took that to mean that the location was to be my new home, but I was very mistaken. The home of which they spoke wasn't a physical location but rather moving in the Will of God longing only to please the Lord by whatever He had for me to do ... even if it was personally painful or costly.
It was a profound learning for me that the "home" God wants me to find is in the doing of His will and going where He sends me ... and nothing more. Yes, I have a home in my parent's beautiful home. Yes, I have found a home in the house of very generous friends ... and as cherished and wonderful as these are, they are seconds to the primary home which is in moving, living, and acting within the Spirit of the Lord in order to accomplish His will and His purpose.
We may be given the job to go to another land and outfit a hospital with solar power and a new fresh water well ... and it is a movement, a work, a deed within God's own will. Whatever it may be, when we go with the direction of God or simply the longing to please the Lord, we will find our true 'home' with the Lord who ceases not and does not rest till every soul finds its perfection in Him.
